12 weeks same schedule...there was an unexplained bliss in it all. I could have chosen to take a cab ride back every Friday, after 13 hours of teaching...(there were friends who had asked me if I needed a ride back after such a long day too and some students...but I always said a polite no...without any reason given...other than..."its ok..am fine")There was something that the bus ride filled me with...which try as I might I could not put a finger to, perhaps because the ride had many a feelings attached and not just one "something"
I looked forward to this 45 minutes just to myself...looking within and without...like no other...reliving moments in the day with students, smiling a little smile at some of the magical moments in class, replaying some of the things said and done in the week gone by, sometimes looking at or for a text from someone...not missing if it didnt beep, looking through life at times too...and some moments etched in time...sometimes memories of childhood and the path travelled thus far...
There was a kind of romance in the ride...almost a love like no other...a strange feeling of "this is my place on a Friday night with me and my thoughts...and we are in sync"
I would watch the same roads, the same bus stops, sometimes the same people at the same places...waiting on a Friday night...living out a routine just like myself...and there was a connection...even without them being aware of it...the strangest feelings which I cant explain yet again...but a feeling of complete...that a "ritual" had been performed...
...and there was a bliss of solitude while I looked at the outside world...
But yesterday as I stepped into the bus there was a void...as this was the last I was taking this year at this time from campus gates...
A beautiful 45 minutes...which would end with my cup of Gong Cha waiting with a smile from the girl at the stall near the stop I got off..who knew I would be there by the 11pm bus...I didnt even know her name...and for once didnt want to...her smile...her service was her greatest identity...again a strange connection unknown as it was...and complete in the unknown...
Yesterday too my Gong Cha waited...and as she said " see you next week...same time" there was a strange feel of void agian...there would not be the same ritual next week...
As I walked back the next 15 minutes...another routine...with my cup of lemon roasted melon tea...sipping through the straw, watching people partying on a weekend...I kept walking with a smile...the same smile for the last 12 weeks too...at seeing the mirth laughter and revelry...and feeling a peace within...the same roads...the same over bridge...and the road home...me completely at peace with myself...
There was a full moon and star that walked with me last night as another chapter closed and I opened the door to my apartment...and I thanked the Creator for all the moments which the Fridays had held...
No comments:
Post a Comment